Let The Words Die

Eyes dark with anguish
And weary from weeping
I pulled you into my world
What a blatant error in judgment!
When I brought you into my pain
I was not asking you to fix it
Or trivialize it with good intentions
I was certainly not asking
For you to undermine me
While you put me on trial
And forced me to validate
The very source of my pain

I was asking you to be sad with me
To burden-bear with me
To attempt to comprehend
The complexity of my brokenness
To free me from the chains
Of desolate sadness
To feel my heartwrenching
And literally breathtaking despair
I was asking you to maybe
Pretend to understand my agony
But even pretense you could not do

So forgive me for not believing
That a problem shared
Is a problem half solved
Because you for one
Have taught me that
Sharing can sometimes
Leave one feeling more alone
And more misunderstood
Than they did before sharing

So I no longer subscribe
To the mindset that requires me
To share my sorrows with you
Or anyone else for that matter
And so even on my darkest days
When I am overcome with fear
That I might combust from the weight
Of all that beleaguers me
I still don’t share
Instead, I remind myself
To let the words die
Before they form